I took my mom to Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

By Rachel Woodward, July 8 2016 —

There are movies you should see with your mom — The Sound of Music or Marley and Me, come to mind. Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates is not one of those movies.

The film involves two brothers of a bride-to-be who discover that their family is concerned with their rowdy behaviour at family events. Their sister begs them to bring “nice” girls to the wedding — who just happen to be two equally rowdy ladies that just want a free trip to Hawaii. The film, starring Zac Efron, Aubrey Plaza, Anna Kendrick and Adam DeVine, turned out to be pretty much exactly what I expected.

The most important thing that I took away from watching this movie is to definitely not — under no circumstances ever — take your mother to see it with you.

I sat beside my sweet, lovely mother as Aubrey Plaza and Anna Kendrick picked out which porno to watch as they smoked weed in their hotel room. I sat in jolted silence beside the woman who birthed me while Mike and Dave’s sister received an all-too-erotic massage by Kumail Nanjiani until one brother walked in for an agonizing, slow-motion grand finale.

What I thought would be a fun night out with my mom, because she said the trailer “looked funny,” just turned into a really, really long drive following the end credits. I knew that this night changed our relationship forever, no matter how many times she said, “it’s okay, I enjoyed it.”

The movie does a fine job of being a typical raunchy summer flick, with Adam DeVine’s entertaining physical comedy and Zac Efron’s exceptional arms — which have defined my life since High School Musical. This movie, however, should never have been seen alongside my darling mother.

Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates had a good soundtrack and kept me entertained. Despite the vile humour, I was pleasantly surprised at how often I laughed, even though I spent most of the movie casting terrified side-glances at my sweet, sweet mother to see how she reacted to the endless dick jokes.

If you’re looking for an over-the-top comedy that ends with a dance number, this movie won’t disappoint. Just don’t bring your mom, okay? Take her to Finding Dory instead.