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How done are you with this semester?
Text by Jill Girgulis, Design by Samantha Lucy, April 4 2017 —… Read the rest
General
Five hot tips to have an awesome BSD
By Derek Baker, April 4 2017 —
The day we’ve all been waiting for is almost here. After a stressful year of school with no end in sight, Bermuda Shorts Day is just around the corner. The last day of … Read the rest
U of C to rewrite “Leon the Frog” to incorporate Energizing Eyes High plan
By Melanie Woods, April 4 2017 —
The University of Calgary suffered a blow last week after the famous “Leon the Frog” poem ascending the Social Sciences tower stairs was accidentally painted over by crews tasked with removing graffiti. While … Read the rest
Five sweet dates with your Tinder bae
By Jesse Stilwell, March 28 2017 —
Navigating dating apps can be quite the adventure. One minute, you’re making clever small talk like “nm, hbu?” and the next, you’re planning your lengthy six-month relationship. Here are some excellent date ideas … Read the rest
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Your group members may not know what the heck they’re doing, but our horoscopes have it covered
By Derek Baker, March 28 2017 —
Aries
(March 21 – April 19)
Your next group project partner will think you’re stupid and refuse to assign you any meaningful portion of the project. Let them — while they’re pulling all-nighters … Read the rest
Five tips to help with the summer job hunt
By Drew Thomas, March 28 2017 —
It’s almost the beginning of April and you haven’t even started looking for a summer job. We feel you. With your peers and Facebook-acquaintances-who-you’d-like-to-lifeswap-with-and-never-change-back prepping for life-changing internships or spectacular travel in the … Read the rest
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Thesaurus unlocks unrestrained potential for English major
By Frankie Hart, March 28 2017 —
Long-retired are the days of mediocre essay grades for first-year English student Arthur Doyle. After discovering the absolute capacity of an elementary, commonplace, prosaic thesaurus, Doyle announced that he has found the nexus … Read the rest
Season of Spring awarded title of most apathetic season in upset over Winter
By Jill Girgulis, March 21 2017 —
For the first time in many years, the season of Spring has surpassed Winter for the title of “Most Apathetic Season.” In order to be eligible for this distinction, candidate seasons had to … Read the rest
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Alt-right club recruits minority executive to prove they’re not racist
By Robin McDonald, March 21 2017 —
After a wave of allegations of racism and sexism, the Friendly Alt-Right Campus Extremists (FARCE) club is taking steps to repair their image. They have recruited a token ambiguous minority to serve as … Read the rest
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Spring into your future with these very real horoscopes
By Grant Jackson, March 21 2017 —
Aries
(March 21 – April 19)
Spring is here and that means it’s appropriate to wear shorts. But please, for the love of all things holy, wear nice khaki shorts. Keep those board … Read the rest