Student gets turkey stuck on head during Thanksgiving

By Frankie Hart, October 5 2018 —

First-year student Theresa Tacchino returned from her visit home from the holidays with a new look. During Thanksgiving, a fight broke out in her family over cranberry jelly, escalating to a point where her brother grabbed the turkey and slammed it over his sister’s head.

The family became panicked when they realized the turkey had become stuck on her head, and took her to the emergency room. Due to an overflow of other Thanksgiving-related injuries, including mashed potatoes stuck in noses and turkey basters stuck in other areas, Tacchino gave up on waiting and returned home.

“I figured since it’s not an injury nor does it really affect my life in any negative way, why not just keep it?” explained Tacchino, her voice slightly muffled through the turkey on her head.

Her family is less pleased with this decision. Tacchino’s brother has asked her repeatedly to seek help in removing the turkey, feeling it is a constant reminder of their fight.

“We had gotten into a fight over whether the cranberries were a sauce or a jelly, and it got a little out of hand,” he stated. “She doesn’t seem to notice or care how this turkey is affecting our family. It feels like we can’t move on from that fight.”

Tacchino emphasized that her decision to keep the turkey on her head was not influenced by the fight with her family, but that she feels that it makes a statement.

“Who do you know that’s willing to mess with a girl with a turkey on her head?”

This article is part of our humour section.