Opinions & Features Workshop (Oct 26th)

Illustration by Sylvia Lopez

What’s your holiday dessert based on your major?

By Rachneet Randhawa, December 22 2021—

Let’s face it — one of the best aspects of the holiday season is the amount of tasty treats we enjoy, relaxing by the fireside on a snowy night. We love some food porn and decided to categorize our foodies by the subject you’re majoring in this festive holiday edition. We guarantee your tummy will be growling for all these sweet treats and more! 

Biological Sciences or Ecology: Shortbread 

Much like the key ingredients in this traditional Scottish biscuit of good quality butter and sugar, you’re practical, to the point and incredibly versatile. With your education affording you a wide range of opportunities from academic research in the lab making groundbreaking discoveries, to tossing on the scrubs and going the medical route. Much like this scrumptious biscuit, the possibilities are endless. 

Political Science or International Relations: Anything that is chocolate fudge 

Chocolate fudge is a bold and sweet dessert, perfect for any occasion. Just like your local politician who continues to “fudge” the issue by refusing to give exact figures you are “fudging it” up by being a delectable treat for anyone who questions you and always enjoys a lively debate. 

Engineering: Figgy pudding

You have an acquired taste not suitable for everyone. But those who appreciate your nuances will benefit from being a dessert connoisseur. Similar to this dessert, you are an exclusive treat — but be patient for the oh-so-delicious first bite. It’s well worth the time to bake, similar to your intense course of study which will give you many great returns in leaps and bounds. 

Nursing: Sugar cookies

A fun but wholesome mix of sugar, spice and everything nice, everybody seems to enjoy snacking on you. You are all but a yummy treat and so sweet as you continue to be of service to others no matter the cost. 

Business or Economics: Red velvet cake 

By default, for some reason, everybody loves you. Perhaps it’s the allure and the way you melt in the mouth on the first bite. But for some reason, there’s a seductive appeal to you that nobody can seem to shake off. Makes sense that you are one of the most popular majors for university students, as you can practically get hired anywhere after graduation.

Psychology: Hot cocoa 

Everybody and anybody loves you. Like seriously — who doesn’t want a hot mug full of peppermint hot chocolate with marshmallows to brighten up their gloomy day? That’s why at least once in their lives everyone should sample you, as taking even one intro to psychology course will rock your world. 

Sociology or Social Work: Cheesecake

You are luscious and creamy, just like the subject. You are flexible and show up to any occasion with your adaptable taste and leave a tangy aftertaste that no one can quite forget. You’re popular too, and don’t tend to disappoint. You also have the ability to cheer anybody up!

History or English: French macarons 

Everyone keeps asking you what you’re going to do with your degree, to which you reply much like the French macaron, you have a diverse palette of taste. You aren’t bougie, but are simply passionate about a niche area that nobody else quite understands. 

Education: Gingersnaps 

Crispy, savoury and a lovable Christmas classic, you are the go-to reliable and authentic bedtime snack during the holidays. Just like the major, you are practical and know what you want. Like how the Gingerbread Man has influenced us all, you too will go out there and mould young minds. 

Communications: Butter tart

Tangy, peppy and sure to pack a flavourful punch, much like the classic tart you make the big headlines as your educational background can literally apply to anything — from digital marketing to crisis communications, everybody needs you. You also taste best during the holidays. At the Gauntlet, we’re all just a bunch of tart lovers. 

Urban Studies: Terry’s Chocolate Orange

You may be the most commercialized of all the desserts but it’s okay! Much like the chocolate orange, you can be smacked around here and there and still taste top-notch. This makes sense considering you’ll be mapping out the nooks and crannies of Calgary.  

Open Studies or Undeclared: Eggnog 

Nobody knows why you’re on the shelves every year and how there are vegan varieties of you galore, but there are. You’re not lost or anything, you’re just exploring your fun options that are out there just like every season’s eggnog.

This article is part of our humour section.


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