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Horoscope: What monster do you turn under that full moon?

By Valery Perez, Ramiro Bustamante Torres, October 24 2023—

Tis the season to fall under the pressure and try to find ways to deal with the stress. With an imminent full moon and the spookiest of holidays right around the corner, the stars have revealed your inner demon based on your zodiac sign.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

When you hear elf, you might imagine the perfect, unattainable elves from some popular fantasy books and you wouldn’t be wrong but you must remember that the fae have been known to be tricky and play with their words. So you might see the face of an angel, but know it’s more a tiny little sneaky elf that you’re talking to.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Just know whenever you close your eyes, you’ll see the closest Scorpio to you. Like a paralysis demon, you won’t be able to do anything about them but stare and hope you wake from the nightmare — or dream for some of you.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Not very well known but hard to miss, they become a draugr. From Scandinavian folklore, this sign will protect their treasure but be a little flighty. They fall between a zombie and a ghost category, switching up for whatever their needs are.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Have you ever heard someone ask you to answer their riddle three before passing a bridge? This sign will put you through trials and tribulations to cross a simple bridge. Although still straightforward, all foresight leaves and the task at hand is all that matters. 

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

You’re not like other monsters, people are split on whether they want to befriend you or swat you away. As Moth Man, this is the opportunity to find out if people would really love you if you were a worm — well, a moth to be exact.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Who’s the most misunderstood sign in the zodiac? A Pisces when they have to explain their feelings to you. Like Frankenstein’s monster, everyone blames you for the actions of a deranged mad scientist. 

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

When the moon is full, this fire sign will take on the form of the perfect hunter, a wendigo. All the naivete and supposed rage leaves their body and all that is left is the shell of the person they were. Avoid getting in their way or they will take you down without mercy.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

For someone with good taste and no need to leave your house unless forced, Dracula is your real personality underneath. Try not to chew someone out for going against your spooky movie choices. 

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

As Edgar Allan Poe said about ghouls, “neither brute nor human.” A Gemini is already jumping between places and people, under the full moon, they will be all that and also take some from everyone around them. Their gluttony for secrets will know no bounds.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

The OG monster under a full moon, a werewolf. You’ll see them transform just like all those TikTok edits with the werewolf filter and the energy is always the same but more annoying. Bring a spray bottle to spray your Cancer friend every time they start howling about what ails them to remind them it’s never that serious. 

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

If you do not give a Leo the attention they need and deserve, they will start haunting you like the Babadook. You won’t be able to get rid of them easily and they will make themselves known to you. 

Virgo (August 23 –September 22)

Something that Virgos struggles with is change and to deal with it, they try to get things to stay the same. As a gorgon with a single look, turning others to stone, they won’t have to deal with anyone and their ever-changing moods.

This article is part of our humour section.

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