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Horoscope: Hot girl summer

By Ramiro Bustamante Torres, June 17 2022

Summer is upon us and with it, new adventures and shenanigans commence — along with new problems. What’s in store for the signs’ #HotGirlSummer?


(May 21 – June 21):

This is your season, you will be able to find out the juiciest secrets from everyone you know and what they are hiding from you. Don’t be upset when you dig too deep and find that no one likes you as much as you thought.


(June 22 – July 22):

You will decide to make this summer your summer and go out with a bang. Unfortunately, what you will actually be doing is blasting through your bank account.


(July 23 – August 21):

You see this as an opportunity to prepare for your coming season. In the midst of your preparations, you will turn down plans which will lead you to inadvertently missing most of your summer.


(August 22 – September 22):

You will be close to completing long-term personal projects this summer which you would like to reward yourself for afterwards. Remember that starting a new project is not a reward.


(September 23 – October 22):

The urge to find yourself will lead to looking up plane tickets. Sadly, your budget only allows you to fly out to the nearest town over. 


(October 23 – November 22):

You had a busy semester and will now take the free time to work on making a better version of yourself. Unlike a phone, there is no available software update but therapy and the gym are always an option. 


(November 23 – December 21):

Speed dating may seem like a fun choice with your alluring charm. Have your fun but remember that there is more fun when someone knows the inner you.


(December 22 – January 19):

The busyness of the winter semester is over and now you have nothing big to work on. Have you considered maybe working on yourself?


(January 20 – February 18):

Summer for you means all play and no work — a time to try new things. Avoiding your friends and spacing out are not something new and fun.


(February 19 – March 20):

This summer you will face something new, intriguing and outside your comfort zone. Also, beware of bears on hikes. 


(March 21 – April 20):

You will kick-off your summer with a plan of doing everything you possibly can. You will forget to plan breaks in between and this could lead to fun burnout.


(April 21 – May 20):

Summer time is the break-out-of-your-shell time. Or maybe get a new shell since the one you currently have is a little musty.

This article is part of our humour section.

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