2022 SU General Election Full Supplement

Illustration by Sylvia Lopez

Horoscope: Fall activities the signs are getting dragged to

By Ramiro Bustamante Torres, October 17 2022

As the leaves turn yellow and the threat of snow looms over every student, this is also the perfect time for fun autumn activities your friends will drag you to. Look for your friend’s sign to see what you might have to fake-smile through.


(Sept 23 – Oct 22):

For a Libra, there is nothing more fun than baking goods with friends for the fall. Whether you are gluten-free or not, your Libra friend will have you over at their place to try their pumpkin-spiced cinnamon buns and all its iterations.


(Oct 23 – Nov 22):

Cuffing season has started and this friend will not wait for you to make a move and force you on double dates with them so they can find the perfect person for their couples costume.


(Nov 23 – Dec 21):

What better way to forget your problems than going out on a hike to see the larches turn yellow? Make sure to have your hiking gear ready just in case you get a call early in the morning.


(Dec 22 – Jan 19):

Beware of trivia nights at pubs, for this friend will drag you to each and every one of them if they can. If somehow they get the wrong answer they will simply find a way to debate their way into convincing everyone they are right based on technicalities.


(Jan 20 – Feb 18):

With Halloween just around the corner, when going to haunted houses or exploring the abandoned house at the end of the road, you know an Aquarius will be there. So keep your eyes peeled for your friend’s BeReal and if you see them at a new condemned building this week, just know they will want to take you there later.


(Feb 19 – Mar 20):

Check your messages, a Pisces might have already messaged you about the newest coffee shop in town and they will want to get a hot chocolate even if a Chinook has brought the temperature back to the plus 20s. They will also take this time to tell you about their latest impulse purchase and family drama.


(Mar 21 – Apr 20):

You might say that an Aries is aggressive and would enjoy pumpkin carving just for the act of gutting the pumpkin and using sharp objects. In reality, this will be one of the most peaceful moments for an Aries since this activity appeals to their inner child. That and they will be too concentrated on making the most detailed carving possible.


(Apr 21 – May 20):

As soon as the wind chills a little bit and the leaves start to fall, this is a sign that your Taurus friends will choose warmth and comfort over everything. Most of their closet is already made for the fall and the coming winter so they will only want plans that involve being indoors.


(May 21 – June 21):

You might get a few invasive questions about your to-be read list of books from your Gemini friend which will then prompt an invitation to a book club. Be warned that they will not actually read that book but use that time to tell you all the gossip they heard through the week, but at least you are getting one book off your list.


(June 22 – July 22):

If you’re a scaredy cat, avoid your Cancer friend for they will force you to sit through some of the spookiest films known to humanity. Even if they themselves are not particularly brave, the season calls for some haunting features and they will want someone to be more afraid than them.


(July 23 – Aug 21):

What is a corn maze but a place to force others to spend time with you with no escape? A Leo will purposefully get both of you lost so they can be the centre of your attention.


(Aug 22 – Sept 22):

Their season might have already ended, but a Virgo will continuously present their best — this includes their yard. They will want to rake the fallen leaves and keep a neat pile on the side to ensure they have the perfect pile of leaves to jump in and have a social media-worthy video. You might be lucky enough to join them or be assigned the camera holder.

This article is part of our humour section.

Hiring | Staff | Advertising | Contact | PDF version | Archive | Volunteer | SU

The Gauntlet