Photo by Michael Sarsito

What coffee should you choose based on your major

By Maham Fatima, October 24 2023—

As University of Calgary students, we all have some things in common — staying up late, dealing with sleep deprivation and relying on caffeine to help us power through our classes. We have many caffeine vendors on campus including Tim Horton’s, Good Earth, Starbucks, and more. With so many options, it can be daunting to pick a caffeine source — which is why we have picked the perfect caffeine source based on your major to keep you awake and energized. Let’s get caffeinated. 

Computer Science Majors: Java Chip Frappuccino

You have very intense late-night debugging sessions, and there’s no better drink for you than a Java Chip Frappuccino. This Frappe’s sweetness will comfort and energize you during your many coding projects — all while paying homage to U of C alumni, James Gosling’s Java language.

Education: Caffè Mocha

You’re a kid at heart. We know you would love to just order a hot chocolate, but for an extra caffeine kick this coffee mocha, a delightful blend of coffee and hot chocolate is the perfect compromise for these future educators. 

Business: Awake Chocolate Bar

Let’s face it — we have all wondered how much of our lives we’ve spent waiting. From amusement park rides to hospitals or our daily coffee runs, the amount of time we waste is shocking. As the old saying goes: “Time is money”. You focus on productivity and profit, so you reach for Awake chocolate – a sweet treat and an energy boost. So, why wait until you can carry this bar to have more time and energy to come up with your next business idea?

Mathematics: Double Double

Math majors love numbers, so naturally, your coffee must also involve numbers. In the equation x + y = the perfect coffee, where x represents cream and y represents sugar, the answer is simple: x=y=2. This Canadian classic, the Double Double, has the perfect ratio of cream and sugar giving you the strength to solve any difficult equation. 

Chemistry: Nitro Cold Brew 

Chemistry students love experiments – I mean isn’t that why you chose this major? Your perfect caffeine is a Nitro Cold Brew. Although you don’t wear your lab coats everywhere, you surely will love how this drink is made by infusing cold brew with nitrogen. Nitro Cold Brew is a higher caffeine source than traditional coffee with a smooth texture, perfect for those long lab hours. 

Engineers: Monster Energy Drink

You have an intense workload and schedule. It’s much easier to carry caffeine to be used at any time, so your drink of choice is a Monster energy drink. You don’t have time to wait in the long lineups in MacHalls’s Tim Hortons. I mean Monster’s slogan is literally “Unleash the Beast.” So, when you are faced with exercises, projects, and internship applications you can grab a Monster and unleash your inner beast to battle your heavy workload. 

History: Cold Brew 

I honestly do not know how you can keep awake while studying so many facts, but you really enjoy it. However, you may find yourself falling asleep in lectures sometimes. The perfect drink for this major is a cold brew. This concentrated coffee drink has more caffeine than regular coffee. This coffee has been steeped as long as your reading material, making it the perfect companion for savouring those historical facts.

Matcha: Health Science  

You understand the importance of what we put in our bodies, so your perfect drink is matcha tea. It contains caffeine and amino acids (more than green tea typically has). Not only do you get your caffeine fix, but you also get amino acids — it’s a double dosage of self-care! When making a healthy choice, you can’t go wrong with matcha tea. 

Fine Arts: Dragon Drink Refresher 

You are known for your creativity and fashion sense. The world is your canvas. So of course, you need a drink to match your aesthetic. The beautiful and colourful Dragon Drink is a perfect accessory for you and your cool sense of fashion and style. This delicious work of art has a creamy coconut milk base with slices of dragon fruit. It’s a refreshing treat with just the right amount of caffeine.

This article is part of our humour section.


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