University of Calgary’s new TITL building lives up to its unfortunate acronym

By Josh Perlette, May 24 2016 —

A recent survey found that the majority of University of Calgary students believe the new Taylor Institute for Teaching and Learning (TITL) is the best place to get to second base on campus. Students and instructors have groped in vain for a space to foster higher education for years.

“I frequently visit the building to unwind after long study sessions,” third-year anatomy major Colin Coppafield said. “It’s the perfect place to let loose.”

After a few disappointing results from his spring course, Coppafield hopes to find inspiration in the building to push up his spirits.

“I scored double-D’s on these two papers, so I could use a lift,” he said.

Further studies conducted by the Browning Research Association (BRA) found that instructors are absolutely titillated by the opportunity to utilize the learning spaces offered within the building. BRA holds TITL at the top of their academic rankings.

“The facility is a welcome addition in my books,” said Connor McRacken, president of the Bureau of Education for Well-Being (BEWB). “The grope study areas provide a space for students to get a better feel for their learning material.”

However, not all organizations are pleased with the new action the building has seen. The Body Against Damn Undergraduates Necking and Kissing And Doing Unruly acts in New Knowledge Structures (BADUNKADUNKS) feels the space should not be used for obscene acts.

“The TITL was built to promote intellectual achievement -— not sexual achievement,“ BADUNKADUNKS chairperson Kelly Booblonski said.

The TITL has attracted guest instructors from the National Institute of Professors (NIP) to teach upper-level seminars. Fourth-year engineering student Yaneep Slippin is is enrolled in Engineering 501.69: Mechanics of Motorboats and Other Watercraft, taught at the TITL by a professor from the NIP.

“I never knew so much physics went in to motorboating,” Slippin said. “The interactive classrooms in the TITL really help solidify concepts.”

Slippin then made a deliberate point of typing 8008135 into his calculator.

Hayley Hooters, resident historian of the Research and Curated Knowledge Society (RACKS) said that promoting student engagement is the main goal of the building.

“We try to stimulate the students’ minds with concepts that can be quite hard to grasp,” Hooters said. “The interactive classrooms allow us to squeeze every last drop of knowledge out of their heads.”

In cooperation with the Teaching and Tutoring Administration Society (TATAS), building expansion plans are set to begin in the fall semester. TATAS will provide a more hands-on approach to learning for students in the TITL.

With most students returning to campus in September, the TITL is sure to see a lot more action in the upcoming academic year.

This article is part of our humour section.